The joy (and terror) of siblings learning music simultaneously!

Can I learn to play the flute, mummy?

Actually, I need to play the clarinet!

Can I learn Piano, mummy?

Ella plays an instrument, why can't I?

I might be good at the clarinet as well!

Yvie plays the piano, we already have a piano, why can't I learn it also?

Why can't I learn to play two instruments as well?

Hmm!

Here, I will explore the pros and cons of how music began as a hobby and then, sneakily, took over our lives. I have two daughters: Ella, who is 13 and plays clarinet and piano and Yvie, who is 10 and plays the piano and wants to play clarinet or violin.

Aged 7, following a school presentation on classical music instruments, Ella informs me she wants to learn to play, having teensy hands, the flute was out and the clarinet in.

We look at the costs: instrument, lessons, maintenance and materials, and figure, it could be worse; she might want a pony!

Having only one child developing a moderately expensive habit...err... hobby...we say yes.

We consider the obvious: she is a 7-year-old child with a thirst for new experiences; how long will this last? She will be fed up by Christmas; next year; in 12 months, ergo, we shall buy a plastic clarinet and sell it on, once she is bored.

Fast forward 2 years. Yvie, aged 7 asks to learn to play the piano; being a militant mother, I pose the question: how badly do you want to play? Really badly is the reply. Ah, ok then, come back to me in a year and if that is the case, you will still want to play! Then we will talk.

Jump forward a year, Yvie is now 8. Like a puppy with a squeaky bone, she asks, 'has it been a year: can I learn to play the piano now?' You have to admire that tenacity.

I set about researching a local music teacher who could teach both piano and clarinet; well, a 45-minute drive was as local as it got! Here is the pivotal moment, which now plays in slo-mo in my head, when music began its subversive re-prioritising of our lives.

That year Santa brings Yvie an electronic keyboard, and mummy and daddy offer piano lessons to start in the New Year. Within 5 weeks of Yvie beginning piano lessons, we find ourselves discussing purchasing a piano, this was a leap I was fully prepared to take...in maybe 12 months after I’m certain the investment is for a proven virtuoso!

Quickly, I realise this is not how it works. After all, it’s difficult to pass your driving test when you are learning to drive on a tricycle. Expensive point well made!

We are now the proud owner of a beautifully reconditioned piano and our lounge has been rearranged to accommodate it. Enter the eldest daughter: ‘so Yvie starts lessons and gets a piano within 4 months, I’ve been patiently playing on a plastic clarinet for 3 years to prove my commitment to music, how is this fair?!!’ Err, true, it might be time to acknowledge this fad for music has moved beyond just a stage. So, in one fail swoop, we also now own a beautiful wooden clarinet.

I now have a piano tuner and a clarinet service repair man in my phone contacts! Also, I have become an expert on how to maintain the correct humidity to properly care for our piano.

Soon, we begin scheduled piano practice in the lounge to fit around TV programming schedules: within weeks we are recording far more programmes to watch later, and we no longer even turn the TV on at weekends. Entertaining guests now consists of mini-concerts performed by both pianist and clarinettist due to the proximity of the captive audience. And so, our lounge officially became the Moon Festival Hall!

Hmm! Something needs to give. We now find ourselves in a new house purchase phase. The main factors instigating this move is parking, office space and a music room!! What has happened? Who has a music room?! Really it translates to, I need a room in which there are no musicians. (Sorry all musicians).

So, as you can clearly see, my message is to warn and to enlighten once you dance with the classical devil, it’s a hard ‘rondo’ to ‘fine’!

I jest, mostly. Our life is structured around music lessons, quartet and duet rehearsals, competitions and exams and a lot of practising. Whilst it has become a huge priority for everyone in the family it has also become a joy.

My daughters began their musical journey on the race line as competitors, in a position of ‘on your marks, get set, GO!’, jockeying side by side for musical one-upmanship.

To say this caused tension and sibling rivalry is an acute understatement, however, over time, music has taught us all, as an entire family, how to collaborate; provide mental, emotional and technical support; to self-evaluate; to embrace honesty; to critique constructively; to devise effective practice techniques, not to mention perform DIY psychological profiling!

Music has now become synonymous with all processes associated with learning, growing and bonding. Music has always been a powerful influence for me and now, my children have broadened my understanding on levels I previously couldn’t appreciate, for which I am truly grateful.

If I had to choose between a life with or without learning music, knowing what I now know, I would choose learning music every time. On balance, over the initial and now less frequent arguments, the tantrums, the crying, the crises of confidence, the dark moments of self-doubt, and the sibling rivalry, music has become our mentor for life, it teaches us everything about everything and we love that it keeps company with us.